A Bitchy Foreigner's Perspective

Silly quiz time

2005-06-29T14:10:00.000-05:00

Your Linguistic Profile:

70% General American English

20% Yankee

10% Dixie

0% Midwestern

0% Upper Midwestern

What Kind of American English Do You Speak?

Keith Olbermann is sexy

2005-06-21T18:58:00.000-05:00

And I don't care what anyone else thinks.

Yep, that's a DILF alright.

Dean helping the Republicans?

2005-06-20T07:33:00.000-05:00

From this story regarding Dean's visit to Texas:

"He may be stirring things up down there," Cornyn said of Dean's visit to Texas. "But I tend to think he helps the other side as much as his own."

Oh really, John "Box Turtle" Cornyn? Repeat Dick Cheney's comments from his most recent FAUX News appearance much? Let's see if we can quantify that, shall we?

WASHINGTON (AP) - When it comes to public approval, President Bush and Congress are playing ``how low can you go.'' Bush's approval mark is 43 percent, while Congress checks in at 31 percent, an Associated Press-Ipsos poll found. Both are the lowest levels yet for the survey, started in December 2003.

From this story.

If Dean is helping your side, John, you'd better pray he never stops!

NEWS FLASH!

2005-06-05T16:01:00.000-05:00

PRETTY WHITE CHICK IS MISSING!

How is this story worthy of such prominence? Sure, I guess it's news... but is this the most important thing going on in the world? Why is CNN trying to make its viewers/readers stupid?

Porn on my phone!

2005-05-25T21:19:00.000-05:00

I just bought a Motorola V710 to replace my Motorola T720. The T720 has served me well after all the drops, throws and general abuse. After two years, it was time for a replacement.

The V710 has a 1.2 megapixel camera and has a really nice display. 28 hours after buying the thing, I figured out how to get porn on to it from my PC. I'm such a perv. :-)

Pardon me, ma'am, but your parenting skills suck.

2005-05-19T16:57:00.000-05:00

<rant>

Bratty children are a pet peeve of mine. I have many pet peeves. This happens to be one of the most annoying.

All children are bratty to some extent at some point or another. This behaviour, though, isn't something that should be tolerated or encouraged.

After work today, I stopped off at the grocery store. My neighborhood is very diverse and the shopping population in this particular store consists mainly of queers, hispanics and white trash. Today's encounter was with a white trash brat.

As I turned on to the aisle with all the chips, cookies and crap that'll make you die faster, I hear a little cherub (*snort*) shrieking "MOM! MOM! MOM! MOM!" Oh joy. Mommy and daddy were checking out which brand of ruffled potato chips were the cheapest and deciding which Hefty sack full of them to buy. The brat, about three years old, was sitting in the grocery cart. After about a minute of this "MOM! MOM! MOM!" shit, the brat screamed "MOMMY IS STUPID!" and punched his mom on the arm. What did mom do? Stepped away from the cart so he couldn't reach her. What did dad do? He continued to decide whether he wanted to involuntarily shit himself inside out from eating Olestra or whether he wanted to clog his arteries with fat. In other words, not a fucking thing. Now the kid pointed at the jars of peanuts and started screaming "I WANT THIS! I WANT THIS!" and kept it up while his parents started to wheel his ass around toward the end of the aisle. Mommy gave in to the brat and said "You want peanuts?" The kid yelled "NO!" Mommy picked up the jar of peanuts and said "Do you want these?" This time, bratty dearest yelled "YES!" Great. So the little shit didn't even know what he wanted, he just wanted some attention.

I happened to be done shopping and they started unloading their groceries on the register next to me. The kid was now pitching a fit about how he wanted to walk instead of sitting in the cart.

Not once during this whole procedure did his mom or dad discipline him in any way. In fact, his dad didn't say a damn word and barely even looked at the kid once.

This is the future of America. Gaia help us.

I know there will be many parents out there who say "I'll bet you're not a parent! You don't know how hard it is!" Well, you're right. I'm not a parent. Regardless, I do know what bratty behaviour is, I do know it's inappropriate and I do know that continued bratty behaviour is a result of your piss poor parenting.

</rant>

So I got a bit bored

2005-05-10T17:21:00.000-05:00

I'll post something soon. I promise.

This freaks me out

2005-04-22T21:20:00.000-05:00

From this article:

In Washington, Attorney General Alberto Gonzales said he was "very pleased" with the guilty pleas and emphasized that the government remains firm in its hopes to execute Moussaoui.

"We are seeking the death penalty in the case," he said.

Is it just me or is this the kind of behaviour a government should be taking pleasure and delight in? If it is, then stop this fucking planet, I wanna get off.

We are not amused

2005-04-11T20:17:00.000-05:00

I work for a huge telco. Think company with the annoying "Can you hear me now? Good!" guy but the telco internet side, not wireless. Today I heard something that riled me up more than just about anything.

Seven years ago, I was pimped out to above company before it was borged by Hell Atlantic. Hell Atlantic is one of those companies managed by little Napoleons. We started to feel the effect instantly. Understaffing, massive pressure, etc, etc. But I stuck it out as did several other disgruntled co-workers. After all, in Bush's economy, we're lucky to have jobs.

Since November of 2003, we haven't been allowed to hire anyone full time. Even if we lose people, tough shit. This puts a huge burden of those of us left. The brilliant idea from management on how to handle said problem is to hire contractors at a ridiculous sum that we could probably use to hire 3 people full time. Oh yeah, that's smart.

Anyway, these contractors come via the same pimp that made me his bitch so long ago. He's a nice guy. A huge redneck that likes to hunt and talks with such a twang, he'd make Toby Keith piss his pants, but a nice guy all the same. However, I digress.

He was talking to his latest bitch about how many of us he'd pimped in the past. He said he'd pimped this guy and this guy and, oh yeah, *whispers* even me. Well, the bitch wanted the details. Pimp states, "well, he's gay!" SHOCK, HORROR! Not only that but, "he wasn't gay when I got him his job here!"

BULL FUCKING SHIT.

Seven years ago, I was so closeted, I made Rick Santorum look like a herpes-ridden drag queen. Aside from two very nasty experiences when I was 15 years old, I've always been gay since I hit puberty. It wasn't a choice.

I was not gay, my perky white arse.

I know his statement was due to ignorance but it really fucking hurt. Like he'd never have pimped me if he knew I was a queen. Luckily, big evil telco has an HR policy stopping them from getting rid of me. Even in the state I live in where Jebus says fire them homos.

Ah well, fuck him. Just felt the need to rant.

The Pope

2005-04-01T19:28:00.000-06:00

The media has gone from "All Terri, All the Time!" to "All Pope, All the time!"

It sucks that a human is dying. It happens every second. Multiple times. But I will hold no sadness in my heart for a man, under whose rule, the Catholic women of the planet have had babies they can't afford. Children must starve because a man who has an unemployed penis dictates that Catholics can't use any form of contraception. Children are dying of AIDS because women and men are not allowed to protect themselves. To do so would be against Church teachings, and Jesus would be pissed.

What a crock of shit.

Hitler believed he had to exterminate people to reach his ideals under the guise of divine mandate. The Catholic Church is doing the same thing.

Sleep well, Terri

2005-03-31T18:48:00.000-06:00

Hopefully she'll get more peace and quiet in death than in her past 15 years of being a vegetable.

Now for the loony Christofascist quote of the day:

Jacobson, who has been playing religious and patriotic music outside the hospice for the past three days, said he didn't really believe that Terri was dead.

"I'm not believing the report of man," the bearded man said. "God will raise her from the dead, and all the world will see it."

Full story here.

So

2005-03-30T19:54:00.000-06:00

Jesse Jackson has joined the nutjob zombie crowd. No doubt some will claim there is now bipartisan support for keeping Terri Schiavo's shell breathing. Of course, the truth is that extremist turds from both sides of the political spectrum are big-government, privacy-invading attention whores.

Another lame quiz

2005-03-25T20:38:00.000-06:00

You scored as atheism. You are... an atheist, though you probably already knew this. Also, you probably have several people praying daily for your soul.

Instead of simply being "nonreligious," atheists strongly believe in the lack of existence of a higher being, or God.

atheism

100%

Satanism

92%

Buddhism

71%

Paganism

67%

Christianity

33%

Islam

33%

agnosticism

25%

Judaism

17%

Hinduism

Which religion is the right one for you? (new version)
created with QuizFarm.com

Well, duh.

Rant.

2005-03-21T19:44:00.000-06:00

Fuck the Republicans.

Fuck them for using Terri Schiavo as a political football.
Fuck them for using Terri Schiavo as a diversion from other important issues (social security, Iraq, etc)
Fuck them for their hypocrisy (Bush, when Gov. of TX, signed a bill allowing hospitals to kill poor folks.)
Fuck them for trampling all over states rights.
Fuck them for shitting on the rights of a family.

Lincoln is probably spinning so fast, the centrifugal force will soon create a black hole.

Whoa...

2005-03-16T17:26:00.000-06:00

Remember I was bitching about Sirius radio and their ads? Well, take a peek in the comments. Diego himself weighed in. Now, that was totally unexpected.

I'm happy to say Sirius finally got their ad cycle out of its rabid loop and they're no longer driving me insane. Anyways, Diego, my post definitely wasn't a dig at you, but more at the ad scheduling folks at Sirius.

Self-engrossed Dickwads

2005-03-09T15:13:00.000-06:00

Just WTF is wrong with some people?

Here's a CNN quick vote thingy:

Do you agree with the U.S. call for the IRA to disband?
Yes 64% 6186 votes
No 36% 3543 votes

Ok, which shitheads think that the IRA is a good thing? Coming from England, I know the impact these scumbags have. Blowing up pubs with nail bombs, blowing up half of central London, the list goes on and on. If you don't think the IRA should be disbanded and their members treated as criminals, then you're more or less saying it's ok for Al Qaeda to blow living fuck out of the US.

I know the issue is those in this country with Irish roots who still think they're Irish. Guess what? You ain't. You're about as Irish as Elizabeth I who starved all your ancestors. Get the fuck over it. You're terrorist supporters, not freedom fighters.

Siruis Radio is pissing me off

2005-03-03T10:40:00.000-06:00

Ok, listen up Sirius. I'm all for "getting the unsigned artist heard" but for fuck's sake, you've been advertising "Diego Sandrin" (make sure you roll that 'r', bitch) and his "10 songs in the key of madness" every fucking 10 minutes for the past two months on Air America radio! I appreciate that a lot of his songs come "straight out of actual dreams" that he's had, but I don't need to know that it's on Sirius Spectrum, Sirius Left-of-Center, Sirius Disorder or any other fucking Sirius station EVERY 10 FUCKING MINUTES!! Yeesh!

Propagannon

2005-03-02T10:36:00.000-06:00

The mainstream "liberal" media has done such a bad job of covering this story, you may be unaware of who Jeff Gannon/James Guckert is. Here's a quick rundown.

Jeff Gannon's real name is James Guckert. He managed to obtain White House press passes daily for two years without having any real press credentials and using a fake name. He also had a side "business" whoring himself and his 8+ inch cut penis out to any man who asked. At the same time, he wrote anti-gay articles for a right-wing organization called Talon News which is associated with GOPUSA. Apparently, the left-wing blogosphere has access to more information than the secret service where James Guckert is concerned.

James would probably never have been caught by the lefties if he'd kept his questions objective. But no. Since he reports right-wing hackery, he had to ask this question:

How can you work with those who are divorced from reality?

He was speaking specifically about senate Dems regarding the economy. This, of course, rang alarm bells. It was hardly an objective question. So with a little hunting around, those at dailykos and other lefty blogs outed JeffJames GannonGuckert as a right-wing shill who was also a gay hooker. This led to the tighty-righties shrieking about invasion of James's personal life and accusations of homophobia. Of course, these objections were desperation. After all, when your personal life is plastered all over gay "escort" websites, it's hardly personal is it? After this outing, James went on Wolf Blitzer's show to cry and snivel that his family had been harassed and he'd even been followed to church by crazed liberals. This was, of course, utter codswallop considering that no lefty bloggers had known or put out his real name during the time he claims his family was harassed. Unless his entire family uses the same fake last name, James was dredging for sympathy by lying. That's about par for the course. Blitzer proved during the interview yet again how much of a tool he is. He lobbed softballs at James and never tried to follow-up on any claims that James made. Maybe Blitzer likes a man in uniform too.

Now after a few weeks, James decided to open up his own blog. The scrolling banner at the top of the page says this:

"So feared by the Left it had to take me down"

No, James, we don't fear you at all. Pity you, maybe, but not fear you. You were taken down because you're a fraud, a fake, a phony and a whore in more ways than one. You are like a naughty child who just doesn't get it, even after a good ass whooping. You were spanked so badly by the blogosphere, your ass is now one of the objects than can be seen from space. You were spanked so badly, several charities are taking money to buy aloe vera gel to cool your ass. You were spanked so badly, it takes billions of light years to get from unspanked to you.

So please, James, realize you risk embarassing yourself even further and you will receive another good spanking, but it won't be from a "client".

Tightie Righties

2005-02-26T07:32:00.000-06:00

So the neocon death cult has their panties in a wad because some friend of duh-bya recorded a phone conversation and has released it. I agree that's slimy. However, I'm not a huge hypocrite so I also think that right-wing hero Linda Tripp is a slimy bitch, too.

Silly Quiz du Jour

2005-02-25T16:15:00.000-06:00

THE SATIRICAL POLITICAL BELIEFS ASSESSMENT TEST

Leftwing Wacko

you're a freaking liberal. You're probably fat too. L0L.

Click Here to Take This Quiz
Brought to you by YouThink.com quizzes and personality tests.

Well, duh.

And now...

2005-02-21T18:42:00.000-06:00

I present this (created by a fellow kossack at dailykos.com):

It's in response to a nasty-ass mean-spirited anti-AARP ad by the neo-con swift boat liars for Bush who claim that the AARP are anti-troop and pro-marriage equality. Their ad is linked here. Have bleach ready to clean your monitor afterwards.

And they say we haven't broken the weather

2005-02-20T19:36:00.000-06:00

It's February 20th, it was 81 degrees today here in Dallas and I got sunburned so bad, my neck is as red as Rick Santorum's ass after he's been "playing" with a pitbull.

Joining the 7% Club

2005-02-15T16:37:00.000-06:00

In November of 1995, 8 months and one day after I moved to the US, I received the worst news up until that point in my life. My grandma, 62 years of age, had died of lung cancer.

It struck me as very odd that a woman of her years who smoked 6 cigarettes a day or less and was in extremely good shape could succumb to such a disease. But she did.

Five years before this, I was standing on a bridge that crosses a busy highway in my home town of Arnold in Nottingham, England. My sister, a few of her friends, and I were doing what we British tweens did back then -- nothing. My sister and her friends had taken up smoking cigarettes. I'd never tried it, but that cold night would change all of that. Michelle offered me a Benson and Hedges cigarette. Those, along with "Embassy No. 1" were the "cool" cigarettes to smoke. I nervously took the smoke and lit it up after a few failed attempts. No one told me you had to suck while lighting it. I breathed in the fumes of my first cigarette and instantly my throat and lungs went in to shock. I doubled over the edge of the bridge, coughing like a fiend, and promptly vomited.

By the time I turned 13, I was up to 10 cigarettes a day. My mother funded my habit. Not intentionally at first, of course. I'd cut back on buying lunch and would buy a pack of 10 Embassy No. 1 at the corner shop before catching the bus to school. We'd run up to the top deck of the bus where you could still smoke. That's verboten now. The typical routine was a smoke on the bus on the way to school, a smoke during the morning break if some nosey teacher wasn't watching us, two or three at lunch and one on the bus on the way home. During my three years of school that I smoked on school property, I think I was caught exactly twice. Not that I cared.

When I moved to the US at the age of 17, I was a 20-cigarette-a-day smoker. My parents had to buy my smokes then since the legal age is 18. And before I was legal, as I heard that my grandmother's windpipe had ruptured from coughing constantly and she had bled to death on her bathroom floor, I vowed I would quit.

Seven attempts later, here I am. Two days shy of one year smoke free and feeling pretty damned good about it. Seven percent is the number of people who quit and stay quit for a year. It definitely wasn't easy, that's for sure. I had three or four months of absolute hell. If it wasn't for my boyfriend and family keeping me honest, I would have slipped more than once. On Thursday, I'll crack open a bottle of champagne and drink to my recovering lungs, my health, and my grandma, without whom I probably would have let smoking be the death of me.

Welcome Back, Howie Dean!

2005-02-12T11:37:00.000-06:00

I am so glad he's running the party. No one else can work the Dems and get them interested from the bottom to the top as effectively as Dean. It's also nice to see the right attacking him so viciously already -- they're scared. It's wonderful!

Cheesy Joke

2005-02-02T08:01:00.000-06:00

Dubya is so dumb, he thinks an unfunded mandate is when neither queen wants to pay for dinner!

Spiffy editorial toon

2005-01-27T07:49:00.000-06:00

Nuff said.

Opposing Gonzales

2005-01-26T19:36:00.000-06:00

Thanks to Annatopia where I saw this first, and to Daily Kos.

Unprecedented times call for unprecedented actions. In this case, we, the undersigned bloggers, have decided to speak as one and collectively author a document of opposition. We oppose the nomination of Alberto Gonzales to the position of Attorney General of the United States, and we urge every United States Senator to vote against him.

As the prime legal architect for the policy of torture adopted by the Bush Administration, Gonzales's advice led directly to the abandonment of longstanding federal laws, the Geneva Conventions, and the United States Constitution itself. Our country, in following Gonzales's legal opinions, has forsaken its commitment to human rights and the rule of law and shamed itself before the world with our conduct at Guantanamo Bay and Abu Ghraib. The United States, a nation founded on respect for law and human rights, should not have as its Attorney General the architect of the law's undoing.

In January 2002, Gonzales advised the President that the United States Constitution does not apply to his actions as Commander in Chief, and thus the President could declare the Geneva Conventions inoperative. Gonzales's endorsement of the August 2002 Bybee/Yoo Memorandum approved a definition of torture so vague and evasive as to declare it nonexistent. Most shockingly, he has embraced the unacceptable view that the President has the power to ignore the Constitution, laws duly enacted by Congress and International treaties duly ratified by the United States. He has called the Geneva Conventions "quaint."

Legal opinions at the highest level have grave consequences. What were the consequences of Gonzales's actions? The policies for which Gonzales provided a cover of legality - views which he expressly reasserted in his Senate confirmation hearings - inexorably led to abuses that have undermined military discipline and the moral authority our nation once carried. His actions led directly to documented violations at Abu Ghraib and Guantanamo and widespread abusive conduct in locales around the world.

Michael Posner of Human Rights First observed: "After the horrific images from Abu Ghraib became public last year, Secretary of Defense Donald Rumsfeld insisted that the world should 'judge us by our actions [and] watch how a democracy deals with the wrongdoing and with scandal and the pain of acknowledging and correcting our own mistakes.'" We agree. It is because of this that we believe the only proper course of action is for the Senate to reject Alberto Gonzales's nomination for Attorney General. As Posner notes, "[t]he world is indeed watching." Will the Senate condone torture? Will the Senate condone the rejection of the rule of law?

With this nomination, we have arrived at a crossroads as a nation. Now is the time for all citizens of conscience to stand up and take responsibility for what the world saw, and, truly, much that we have not seen, at Abu Ghraib and elsewhere. We oppose the confirmation of Alberto Gonzales as Attorney General of the United States, and we urge the Senate to reject him.

Burn my eyes out with acid

2005-01-21T07:31:00.000-06:00

Last night I went to Gloria's to eat. It's a little South American place in Dallas. For some unknown reason, they have about 8 televisions in the restaurant, all tuned to FOX News with the subtitles turned on. Now, I despise FOX News. It's nothing but extreme right-wing propaganda. Unfortunately, when it's on TV, it has the same effect as seeing a car wreck. I can't help but look. What infuriated me last night was their coverage of King George's coronation. Specifically, their coverage of the protests. First, they find the most fucked-up, drugged-out protestors on the planet to interview. The interviews typically went along the lines of "yeah, man, I hate George Bush, man, cuz he kills people, man". I mean come the fuck on. FOX News viewers already have a warped enough perception of what the opposition is. Oh, and FOX specifically stated "Thousands of supporters and some protestors gathered today to watch the inauguration...." Well I may have been mistaken, but from what I saw on CSPAN2 and have read just about everywhere else, "THOUSANDS of PROTESTORS and SOME SUPPORTERS" would have been the correct wording.

FOX News. We distort, you comply. Get off the fucking air.

Just what is "Political Capital"?

2005-01-20T07:20:00.000-06:00

And will Bush create a massive deficit with that, too?

For God's Sake, Eat Some Fiber

2005-01-19T13:54:00.000-06:00

I have some of the nastiest co-workers. When you're in a bathroom, you can't help but hear other people's bodily functions. There are several different types of toilet-goers.

The chatter. No, I really don't want to talk to you at the urinal. I mean, seriously. When I have my johnson in my hand I lose the ability to talk.

The man who doesn't obey urinal etiquette. There are four urinals in the bathroom. The first person to enter must use the one farthest from the door. The second person must use the urinal farthest from the first person. If, God forbid, someone else comes in to the bathroom, they must either pretend to be busy looking at themselves in the mirror or take a stall. Do not under any circumstances stand right next to someone.

The cell-phone user. The mics on cell phones are very sensitive. The person you're talking to knows you're taking a leak. Or ever worse, a dump. I've heard people on their phones discussing business while letting out a trump so loud, one would expect rapture.

The filthy fucker who doesn't wash his hands, even after stall use. I know who you are and when I refuse to shake your hand, feel ashamed. Feel very ashamed.

And last, but not least, he who does not eat fiber. The resounding noise resembles somewhat a rabid castanet player or a malfunctioning automatic weapon.

Yuck. On so many levels, just yuck.

Update:
And being performed today in the bathroom, "Song of the Excited Duck", Movement #2.

Creation "Science"

2005-01-18T13:07:00.000-06:00

You know, if one of these shit-for-brains creationists say "evolution is only a theory!" one more time, I'm gonna scream and scream and scream until I make myself turn purple and vomit.

Yes, evolution is a theory! However, "theory" when talking about science means the following (thanks the the author of the Wikipedia article who is much more articulate than I am):

Often the statement "Well, it's just a theory," is used to dismiss controversial theories such as evolution, but this is largely due to confusion between the scientific use of the word theory and its more informal use as a synonym for "speculation" or "conjecture." In science, a body of descriptions of knowledge is usually only called a theory once it has a firm empirical basis, i.e. it

is consistent with pre-existing theory to the extent that the pre-existing theory was experimentally verified, though it will often show pre-existing theory to be wrong in an exact sense,

is supported by many strands of evidence rather than a single foundation, ensuring that it probably is a good approximation if not totally correct,

has survived many critical real world tests that could have proven it false,

makes predictions that might someday be used to disprove the theory, and

is the best known explanation, in the sense of Occam's Razor, of the infinite variety of alternative explanations for the same data.

This is true of such established theories as evolution, special and general relativity, quantum mechanics (with minimal interpretation), plate tectonics, etc.

So creation scientists, please go back to boycotting advertisers whose commercials are on during a little steamy TV and shove your science textbook stickers up your pompous, holy arses. TIA.

Update 1:

And while I'm on the subject, will you Jesus freaks please stop spreading the myth that evolution teaches humans evolved from apes? Scientists have been trying to dispel that one for over 100 years. Apes and humans have a common ancestor. Get it? Good.

Fishies

2005-01-16T08:44:00.000-06:00

I've been keeping freshwater fish for a long time. The first I remember was a triad of goldfish I kept in a bowl when I was about 11 years old or so. After one committed suicide by jumping out of the bowl one day and the other two fried when I made their water a tad too tepid, I lost interest. A couple of years ago, I caught the bug again. I bought a 3 gallon tank, a couple of silver dollar fish and a couple of freshwater sharks. Silver dollars are the hippy, shy, vegetarian cousins of the pirana. I know that sounds like a lot for a tiny tank, but these fish were small. Well, the sharks died but the silver dollars lived on. Being a total tard and not really knowing how to manage a freshwater tank, I performed not a single water change until the tank got so gunked up, I had to buy a new tank. I got a 6 gallon tank. My two silver dollars lived on.

After I moved in with my boyfriend, I decided I wanted a 20 gallon tank. So I got that, put my silver dollars, two more new silver dollars, two powder blue gouramis and a bunch of neon tetras and dayglo tetras in there. I added a plecostomus , a couple of cory catfish and an African dwarf frog. Those things are so comical. Everything they do looks clumsy and accidental. Anyway, all of this got to be way too much for the 20 gallon tank, especially since the plecostomus is about 8 inches long now and the two original silver dollars are about 5 inches in length. My boyfriend really didn't want me to get a bigger tank but feh, whatever. I took a couple of days off work last week to get my wisdom teeth pulled. On Friday, I went to Petsmart and got myself a 50 gallon tank and nice maple wood stand. It looks so purty. I will post pics when I can figure out how to get a decent pic without glare and reflection.

There's really not a point to this post so if you got this far, congratulations. I just thought I'd post something since I just did my first tank vac and water change. :-)

I am so white bread

2005-01-01T16:45:00.000-06:00

I adore white bread. Good white bread, that is, not the store-bought crap. When I went to visit my parents for the holidays, I was spoiled since my mother makes all of her own bread. So I decided to give it a try today. I made what we call "camel's head". It's named that because of the tendency the bread has to look all kinds of fucked up when it's done cooking. Anyway, here's the recipe I used and directions and the pics of my finished product are linked at the bottom of this post:

1 cup warm water
1/4 cup white sugar
2 1/4 teaspoons active dry yeast
3/4 teaspoon salt
2 tablespoons vegetable oil
3 cups bread flour

Directions:

1) In a large bowl, dissolve the sugar in warm water and stir in the yeast. Let the mixture sit until the yeast resembles a creamy foam (1 gin and tonic or so. 10 minutes.)
2) Mix salt and oil in to the yeast mixture. Mix in flour one cup at a time. It'll be rather difficult to mix after the second cup, so knead it in from there. Plop the dough out on to a floured surface and knead for a few minutes until smooth. Place in a well oiled bowl (sprayed with Pam or something is fine) and turn the dough to coat it in oil. Cover with cling wrap that has been sprayed with Pam or oiled in some other way. Allow to rise until doubled in bulk (3 gin and tonics or an hour.)
3) Punch dough down. Knead for a few minutes and throw in to an oiled 9x5 loaf pan. Allow to rise another 30 - 40 minutes (another 2 gin and tonics), or until the dough has risen 1 inch above pan.
4) Baked at 350 for 30 minutes.

If you can still walk at this point, eat the bread. It's yummy. The pics of my finished product are here and here.

So you're not supposed to speak ill of the dead...

2004-12-28T07:38:00.000-06:00

However, I can't help not caring that Reggie White is dead. Yeah, so he did a few good things but he was still a damned homophobe. If some racist or sexist died that helped a few kids, how do you think they would be remembered? That's right, as a racist or sexist.

One can only hope that as Reggie rots, he doesn't stink up the earth as much as he did during his life.

Silly Quizzes

2004-12-10T16:37:00.000-06:00

I love these things. This one I ran across on Robyn's blog.

You Are From Venus

You love all forms of beauty. You love dressing up and anything luxurious.
A social butterfly, you're incredibly popular and a great host.
You're known for your fairness and affection. And as a frind to all.
Careful though! You're desire to please may make you too willing to conform.
Be yourself. Focus on what matters to you. You'll be all the more popular for it.

What Planet Are You From?

Some self-motivation

2004-12-07T15:55:00.000-06:00

I've been vowing to get in shape for some time. I've done that on again, off again thing where I'll work out and eat right for a week or two, and then eat a whole big bag of Lay's chips or something in one sitting and decide not to get on the treadmill. So, I've decided to use my blog for tracking my workouts and weight as well as bitching about politics. If you, dear reader, don't like that then that's just tough patootie.

Today I sat at home feeling miserable. I was out of work sick. I hate being sick because I hate spending the entire day in the house. Daytime television is the most absolutely awful tripe I've ever seen and it certainly explains the idiocy of certain demographics.

But anyway, I stepped on the scale this afternoon after a 3 week lapse in working out/eating right. Keep in mind I'm 5'11", slim build and weighed 165 lbs in June. Well, now I weigh 188 lbs. My fat ass has gained over 20 lbs in 5 months. I know 188 lbs doesn't sound like a lot for someone who is almost 6 ft tall, but it is when it's all on your ass and stomach. I dragged my sick self over to the treadmill and walked slowly so as not to hack up a lung from this damn cold. I spent an hour on there at about 3.5 MPH. Judging by pulse monitoring, that should have knocked off over 400 calories.

Now I need to do some research on foods that are not too high in calorie content and fill you up. Looks like high fiber/low fat food supposedly does. I think I'll go chew on a rug. I'm feeling starved already and dinner isn't for another couple of hours.

Enough whining.

Log: 1 hr, 3.5 MPH, 441 calories.
Weight: 188.5 lbs

A Confession

2004-11-29T19:14:00.000-06:00

I just bought something that was advertised in a banner ad. No, I won't say what. Yes, I'm ashamed. No, it's nothing sleazy. Yes, it's legit. I felt the need to confess and feel ridiculed all the same.

You know what makes me mad?

2004-11-26T17:07:00.000-06:00

All the Democrats that are blaming the loss of the election on John Kerry, saying he wasn't a strong enough candidate. What a load of horseshit. I realize he wasn't the first choice of many Dems, myself included (my preference would have been Dean, then Mosely-Braun) but we still supported him, right? The same people I saw screaming about the virtues of Kerry vs. the ineptitude of Bush are now the ones saying "meh, Kerry was too weak." You know how that makes you look? Like a fucking hypocritical fool, that's how.

If you're in the above category, for the sake of all that exists, figure out what the hell was really wrong instead of blaming the loss on Kerry. Otherwise, you'll be blaming the Republican win on the next Dem candidate in 2008.

Rest Well, Margaret Hassan

2004-11-17T19:06:00.000-06:00

I am so incredibly disheartened that a woman as generous, as caring and as giving as this one could be so brutally murdered. Please keep Margaret and her family in your thoughts and, if you're so inclined, prayers.

Texas Weather

2004-11-15T20:12:00.000-06:00

Being British, my first and foremost interest is the weather. If you put two Brits together, regardless of whether they know each other or not, they will discuss the weather within the first 5 minutes of their conversation. If they're both in the US, they will also bemoan the fact that it is impossible to find "real" fish and chips here. It's genetic or something. It's not just cliche. Anyway, I digress.

Texas gives me lots of material to talk about. Two weeks ago was shorts weather, and now it's just about cold enough to freeze the tits off a brass monkey. I thought we'd truly broken the weather this year. It pissed it down with rain at least bi-weekly which is unusual for an area that is usually as dry as a camel's nutsack in the summer. Perhaps, just perhaps we're seeing the results of global warming. Either that or I'm being a paranoid pinko lefty dumbass. Nah. The former sounds more reasonable. As I said to my friend Anna (who is still too depressed about the election to post updates to her blog) we in central Texas will soon no longer need to travel to the beach. The beach will come to us. Combine that with the copious sun and heat, we'll have a booming economy. Yay polution!

I think I need another gin and tonic. Toodles.

It's been a while...

2004-11-10T19:50:00.000-06:00

Yep, it's been over a month since I last posted. To be quite honest, no one would have enjoyed reading what I've been thinking about recently. My mind has been filled with bitter resentment, conspiracy theory, thoughts of revenge, etc. I was so very upset about the election. I truly thought John Kerry would win.

So, I decided to do some retail therapy. I got myself Sirius satellite radio for my car. Now I can listen to the frothing liberals at Air America Radio. Or when I'm not in the mood for that, I can listen to NPR World, BBC News, Out Q Gay and Lesbian Radio, comedy, over 60 stations of commercial-free music and various other stuff that those bastards at Clear Channel don't have their icky little paws on.

Anyway, I'm not going to sit here and whine about the election. Hell, no. I'm looking toward 2008 already. I will not feel defeated. I will not feel hopeless. I will not pussy out and move to another country. This is my home, dammit, and I'm going to make the best of it.

Ain't that the truth?

2004-10-02T15:32:00.000-05:00

Amen, sister. Amen.

My take on the debate

2004-10-01T18:13:00.000-05:00

It wasn't so much a debate. More of a stump speech. Both Kerry and Bush had their talking points. However, Kerry's style, manner and speech gave him a clear win in this case. Annatopia did some hunting around after the debate and found that the FReepers were going nuts. Even they thought Bush was coming off as an uneducated chimp (paying your way through school above and beyond tuition alone doesn't count.) Bush looked distraught while Kerry was talking. Democrats.org has a video of all of Bush's facial expressions during the debate. Check it out. It's priceless.

Regardless, this was the debate that Bush should have won if we're to take public opinion seriously. Defense and homeland security are supposed to be right-wing issues and yet Kerry still wiped the floor with him. Bush may as well not bother showing up to the debate on domestic issues. The man has not had one success at home in four years. Let's talk about jobs! Uh... ok, how about education! Hmm... medicare? Nah, social security? Ooops. Ok, how about I don't want them thar faggots to marry? Yeah, that'll get me the white-trash redneck vote!

Bring 'em on, Bushie-boy.

I adore Attaturk

2004-09-28T21:12:00.000-05:00

He's one of the most incredibly interesting and amusing bloggers I know. His link is the Rising Hegemon one on the right. Anyway, he posted this article on his site. Check it out.

The LA Times Grows a Pair

2004-09-28T20:57:00.000-05:00

Woot. Read this article. The LA Times has an obnoxious signin page -- find a login via bugmenot if you don't want to give them any info.

Quote:

Compared with Kerry, George W. Bush is a coward. This is not a reference to their respective activities during Vietnam. It refers to the current election campaign. Bush happily benefits from the slime his supporters are spreading but refuses to take responsibility for it or to call point-blank for it to stop. He got away with this when the prime mover was the shadowy Swift boats group. Will he get away with it when the accusers are his own vice president, high officials of his own administration (Deputy Secretary of State Richard Armitage) and members of Congress from his own party (House Speaker J. Dennis Hastert or Sen. Orrin Hatch)? The answer is yes: Based on recent experience, he probably will get away with it.

PRAISE BE! This is pretty impressive for The LA Times. Now I really need to understand why Bush is polling at over 50%. I don't get it. He's an idiot, he has less than a 50% approval rating, the mainstream media is not offering him too many compliments, Iraq is a mess, the economy is on the verge of being in shambles (that's what just about killed his daddy, apart from Saddam), the list goes on. Look, I can understand being partisan to some extent. Hell, I'm guilty of it but I would not always support a Dem just because they're a Dem. Back in 2000, if it were McCain vs. Gore, I would have supported McCain. There are those that say McCain is a RINO, but whatever. He's generally a good guy. Hmm. That just made me wonder what happened to him after the last Bush photo op.

Anyway, good news, good news.

Jon Stewart rocks my world

2004-09-27T21:27:00.000-05:00

Aside from being a sexy beast, his show just proved that his viewers are more highly educated than Bill O'Reilly's viewers. This after O'Reilly saying:

You know what's really frightening? You actually have an influence on this presidential election. That is scary, but it's true. You've got stoned slackers watching your dopey show every night and they can vote."

Yeah, you were joking, O'Reilly, but who gets the last laugh here, huh?

What is with Pat Robertson?

2004-09-25T08:43:00.000-05:00

From the CBN website:

The Bible tells us in Psalm 2, “the kings of the earth set themselves, and the rulers take counsel together, against the Lord and against His Anointed, saying, ‘Let us break Their bonds in pieces and cast away Their cords from us.'”

There's a book that says Jack and Jill went up a hill but I don't necessarily believe that either.

This is precisely what we are seeing in America today. The secular rulers of our day want nothing more than to be rid of the moral restrictions of Christianity. That's why they hate the Ten Commandments and want to remove them from the schools, the courts, and every other public place. They want nothing to do with God or Jesus Christ, and they're determined to eradicate every last trace of Christian morality. They want to break the bonds of religion and instill a new secular ideology that is the exact opposite of the truth the Bible teaches.

Well, America is a secular nation. Jefferson said that America was in no way grounded in Christianity. That's not the reason for objection to placement of the 10 commandments. The thing is, they're a judeo-christian relic. Things like "You shall have no other gods before me" do not belong in government-sanctioned areas. Also, the "real" moral principles of the 10 commandments (no killing, stealing, etc) have existed for much longer than the Christ myth.

If you look at the things that are being done today by the ACLU and liberal courts, there's no doubt what's at the heart of their agenda. They want to get rid of every type of sexual restraint, every limit on pornography and indecency, and to forbid any criticism or restraint on homosexuality. They want the freedom to abort the evidence of their sexual sin when it results in the creation of human life; and they want to make sure that Sundays are not viewed as sacred days of worship but are just like every other day.

Now this is where Robertson spins himself dizzy. Could you possibly paint a much less realistic picture? The sane liberal wing of the country quite frankly don't care what happens sexually between consenting adults. Talk to a therapist about your hangups, don't inflict them on us. Ditto for pornography and "indecency", whatever you might conceive indecency to be. Pro- and anti-choice is not a subject I'm going to get in to again. As for Sundays being "sacred" days, your own religion can't agree on that one (Saturday vs. Sunday) and if it were up to the "conservatives", we'd be working 16 hours a day, 7 days a week.

Lastly, Mr. Robertson, if you think the federal and supreme court judges are so liberal and are "activists", complain to Reagan (I know he's dead, leave a message with Jesus, I'm sure he'll get it), Bush Sr. and all the conservatives that approved those judges.

How white trash are you?

2004-09-22T13:51:00.000-05:00

I AM 9% WHITE TRASH!

I, my friend, have class. I am so not white trash. . I am more than likely Democrat, and my place is neat, and there is a good chance I may never drink wine from a box.

Take the WHITE TRASH test at Fuali.com

Almost speechless

2004-09-20T16:40:00.001-05:00

This year, Noam Chomsky said this:

Anyone who says, 'I don't care if Bush gets elected' is basically telling poor and working people in the country, 'I don't care if your lives are destroyed. I don't care whether you are going to have a little money to help your disabled mother. I just don't care, because from my elevated point of view I don't see much difference between them.' That's a way of saying, 'Pay no attention to me, because I don't care about you.' Apart from its being wrong, it's a recipe for disaster if you're hoping to ever develop a popular movement and a political alternative.

That was linked on the The Drudge Retort (not to be confused with the neocon blowhard Matt Drudge's website). Now, The Retort allows commenting on everything they link to. This has to be the most stupid comment I've ever read in my entire life:

You stupid liberals!
Who cares if that stupid doctor from E.R. doesn't like Bush?
You guys are clutching at straws!
The ship has sunk, lib idiots! Good luck after E.R., Noam Chomsky, maybe at McDonalds!

Posted by georgewinsagain at September 20, 2004 05:02 PM

Noam Chomsky? Doctor from E.R.? Oh. My. God. Yeah, I'm almost speechless. I fear for our country when this is the type of person that is voting.

"I got up and I ate a bagel" sort of post...

2004-09-18T14:33:00.000-05:00

To the folks who see me face to face:

No, I haven't gotten too lazy to shave. No, I didn't forget either. Notice I have no neck beard but I do have 5 days of growth everywhere else. This is because every man at some time in his life should attempt to grow facial hair just for the hell of it. I've decided that time for me is now. It is quite frankly a bit like the decision to shave one's tallywhacker but in reverse. At least if I hate the facial hair, it can be fixed in 5 minutes. Shaving Mr. J. Thomas takes a few weeks to get over.

Toning it down

2004-09-18T07:54:00.000-05:00

I just went through a few previous posts and realized that if I were someone else reading my blog, I'd think I was a flaming gasbag. I've gone from bitchy to FReeper-frothy and I don't like that. Anyway, I've cleaned up my previous posts somewhat and will try to maintain some sense of decorum in the future.

The World is Safer Now?

2004-09-16T08:42:00.000-05:00

Yeah, right.

I can't do that cuz Jeebus dun like it!

2004-09-15T20:33:00.000-05:00

Second stupid story of the day.

NEW YORK (AP) -- In Congress and states nationwide, anti-abortion activists are broadening efforts to support hospitals, doctors and pharmacists who -- citing moral grounds -- want to opt out of services linked to abortion and emergency contraception.

But that's not all!

In Mississippi, a bill became law in July that admirers and critics consider the nation's most sweeping "conscience clause." It allows all types of health care workers and facilities to refuse performing virtually any service they object to on moral or religious grounds.

*ahem*

First and foremost, if there is any medical procedure you object to on religious grounds, get out of the sciences. Your beliefs conflict with reality and you are endangering the lives of sane human beings. Second, your morals are yours and yours alone. Morality is objective.

This is scary. The religious reich is finding a backdoor in to the health system and are pushing their disgusting anti-women beliefs down the throats of the entire country. Stop it while you still can.

The biggest shits always float to the top

2004-09-15T16:39:00.000-05:00

In this CNN report, Scott McClellan says of the possibly forged documents that CBS got their hands on:

In terms of the timing of these old, recycled attacks on the president, it is clear that this is an orchestrated attempt by Democrats and the Kerry campaign

Utter poo. Back that up with some evidence.

Oh, and Tom DeLay wants to abolish the First Amendment. Nothing new there. Now if only DeLay could stop the investigation of him by the House Ethics Committee.

I understand that people want to protect their sources, but we're dealing with the alleged forgery of government documents to influence a presidential race during war ... This isn't politics as usual. It's dangerous and possibly criminal.

This kind of thing makes me sick. Did the Bush fedayeen (props to annatopia for that term) say a thing about the Swift Boat Liars attempting to sway the election? Hell, no. Not until it was way too late and even then it was somewhat half-hearted.

Feh. Orwell was 20 years early.

Bush, you are an ass.

2004-09-07T20:45:00.000-05:00

1,000 US military deaths in Iraq. President Bush, I hope you're proud.

And so it begins...

2004-08-29T16:03:00.000-05:00

Even before the start of the Rethuglican convention.

Source: AP Photo/Greg Bull

And another:

Source: AP Photo

What a beautiful sight. Thousands upon thousands of people exercising their constitutional right to tell the government they're angry as hell.

It won't make much of a difference to the billionaire's club that will be meeting in the Garden, sipping on champagne in glasses imported from some eastern sweatshop, eating caviar of one endangered fish or another. But, whatever! They don't have to care. I just hope the general public takes a little interest.

Dear God....

2004-08-24T20:26:00.000-05:00

If Kerry wins the presidency this November, I'll entertain the possibility that you exist. If you make Kerry win Florida, Ohio, Missouri and California, I'll know you exist. If you make Kerry also win Texas and wipe out all of your parasitic followers like Jerry Falwell, Pat Robertson and John Ahscroft, I'll become a celebate monk.

Yours, etc,

The Queen

Just an observation

2004-08-19T12:47:00.001-05:00

I was surfing around eBay recently and the men's clothing section can be particularly interesting. There are all sorts of bizarre, desperate people who will buy anything that is pictured being worn by some guy showing off a little bit more than he's supposed to by eBay's rules.

Anyway, what got my attention was all of the items marked as "gay int", "poss gay int" or "gay interest." After browsing around these items, I have come to the conclusion that these eBay sellers are either perverts or have a very warped perception of what a lot of gay men like to buy. To summarize, "poss/gay int" and/or "gay interest" included the following types of items:

Rubber clothing, chaps, leather shorts/pants, anything that shows off one's balls, skimpy gaudy shirts that only those with steroids and a coke habit could fit in to and anything shiny.

So if you see a bunch of men walking down the street wearing tight leather shorts, a skimpy shiny shirt and a ball gag, you know where they got their outfit.

How Interesting!

2004-08-16T20:26:00.000-05:00

Remember that I said I had a Kerry bumpersticker on my car? Well, I didn't have a whole lot of trouble with that one. However, a couple of weeks ago, I got my "Kerry/Edwards - For A Stronger America" bumpersticker. Boy, did that change things.

I'm not sure if it was the "For A Stronger America" statement that perked the interest of the Republicans (neoconus rabidus) or whether it was the tasteful red/blue color scheme with a flag that has enough ripples to make my car look like one big wrinkle that got them excited, but something did. First, I was getting on to I-35 on my way to work one morning at around 6:40a.m. This huge truck with tires bigger than my entire car whizzed up to me at about 80MPH, slowed down as it got to the side of me and I saw what appeared to be Michael Moore crossed with a Yeti without the sex appeal staring at me. This creature had its middle finger gesturing in a rather provocative position and its gaping maw with a single tooth, dripping with yellow-brown "tobacky" juice yelled what sounded like "FOOK KEREE!!" How odd. I must report this to a local biology professor.

Well, after that encounter, I wondered if another specimen would cross my path. Lo and behold, on Sunday as I was travelling to the local Home Depot, a vehicle composed not quite entirely of rust, yet being held together with a sticker that proclaimed "We Vote Pro-Life!" passed me as I was sitting in a left-hand turn lane. This car not only contained a buck, but a doe and three offspring! How I wish I'd had a camera handy to document the event. But, alas, it was not to be. I was left in awe as the three young turned and raised their middle fingers in unison while grinning. No doubt this is some sort of Republican (neoconus rabidus) greeting. I must remember to use this primitive action when trying to communicate with these beasts in the future.

Bon Appetit, Julia Child

2004-08-14T09:11:00.000-05:00

Goodbye to a wonderful lady and an amazing cook.

What's this? Bush is pondering something worthwhile?!

2004-08-11T07:38:00.000-05:00

According to this story, Bush is mulling the idea of a national sales tax (a sort of 'consumption' tax) and a flat tax to replace the current tax system. I like these ideas. They're more fair than the current percentage-based-on-income crap. I personally prefer the consumption tax idea as it's a tax on what you actually use instead of what you earn. Here's the kicker, though:

Opponents say such a system would not be in the best interests of the poor and the middle class who would pay the same tax rate as the wealthy even though they have less disposable income.

To that, I say "so fucking what?" That's fair! If the poor have less money, they'll consume less and therefore be taxed less! Don't get me wrong, I'm all for helping folks get themselves out of poverty but I'm sure as hell not willing to give them a free ride.

Couldn't have said it better myself...

2004-08-10T07:24:00.000-05:00

From Cagle:

Alan Keyes

2004-08-09T21:13:00.000-05:00

Aside from being a homophobic fuckwit and a general all-around fundamentalist asshole, if you accept the nomination for Illinois senator, you are a carpetbagging hypocrite.

"I deeply resent the destruction of federalism represented by Hillary Clinton's willingness to go into a state she doesn't even live in and pretend to represent the people there," Keyes said. "So I certainly wouldn't imitate it."
- Alan Keyes, FOX News, March 2000.

That will be all.

Which Nigerian Spammer are You?

2004-08-07T12:31:00.000-05:00

Which Nigerian spammer are You?

"Too liberal." WTF does that mean?

2004-08-02T07:27:00.000-05:00

I keep hearing Kerry being accused of being the most liberal Senator and various other sound bites the White House has instructed FAUX News to disseminate and infect the public with. But what does "too liberal" mean? A liberal is someone who loves freedom and continues to think up new ways to solve problems. According to the dictionary:

a. Not limited to or by established, traditional, orthodox, or authoritarian attitudes, views, or dogmas; free from bigotry.
b. Favoring proposals for reform, open to new ideas for progress, and tolerant of the ideas and behavior of others; broad-minded.

The argument "too liberal", therefore, is utter bullshit. Are the neo-cons trying to say Kerry loves freedom too much? That he thinks of new ways to solve problems too much? The issue is that "liberal" is now a dirty word, the true meaning of which has disappeared from the minds of many and has been replaced with a caricature dreamt up by the extreme right wing. Such a shame.

Atheism vs. Agnosticism

2004-07-30T21:40:00.000-05:00

I declare that I am an atheist. Today, a friend said that he was an agnostic and that he wasn't arrogant enough to say "there is no god." Let me explain why I think he is wrong.

Find me two people who define "god" in the exact same way. No two people of the same religion on the planet can do it. Take, for example, Christianity. Each of the denominations are constantly fighting over what god is and what he wants them to do. The Catholic Encyclopedia defines god as such among many other things:

incomprehensible

Well, that's enough to make everything else they say bullshit. If a deity is incomprehensible, why waste time trying to explain what it is? Why waste time believing in something "incomprehensible"?

It's not that I'm arrogant enough to think I hold all of the answers to the universe -- I don't. However, no one has presented a concept of a deity to me that is not full of holes. Therefore until it is proven to me that there is a deity, I am an atheist. Why should I spend time pretending that there might be an invisible pink unicorn in the sky who wants me to worship her? The bitch can come prove herself to me.

You're all damned hypocrites and I am too

2004-07-27T18:54:00.000-05:00

I support John Kerry for president therefore I'm a hypocrite. So are many of my friends. John Kerry does not stand for all of my beliefs and I'm settling for that simply because I don't think the US can stand another four years of Bush.

I have a few friends who voted Nader in 2000 that have said they were sorry they didn't vote Gore. To you people (who no doubt will be pissed off at me after reading this post) get the hell over it. Gore did nothing to inspire you. Gore grew a pair of balls about a year ago or maybe Tipper unlocked the box to his crown jewels. Who knows? The point is, he wasn't worth a vote back in 2000 and that seems to have woken up the Democratic party. Good. Finally. Now we need to do the same with John Kerry. We don't need another wet noodle of a candidate that will lose to that neo-con fuck that is squatting in the White House. Unless there is a candidate to inspire the voters, that's exactly what we're going to get.

John Kerry, get your ass in gear. I'm sick of wimps in the Democratic party and I'll be damned if I'm going to stand for another 2000-like fiasco.

Sickest Spam Ever

2004-07-25T06:59:00.000-05:00

Note the subject line.

From: %FROM_USER@asturies.com
Subject: make your mother happy!
Date: July 25, 2004 2:30:59 AM CDT
To: *snip*
Reply-To: %FROM_USER@asturies.com

PREMATURE

EJ@CULAT1ON ?

Stop Premature Ej@culation!

0RDER N0W
ST0CKS ARE L1M1TED!

FMA Fails!!!

2004-07-14T12:46:00.000-05:00

Final vote record here. News story here.

Needless to say, I'm quite pleased. As expected, both of my senators (Hutchison and Cornyn) voted with the minority. McCain just gained much needed brownie points with me after his Dubya commercial deal. Snowe is one of the few sane Republicans in the Senate that understands what a Republican really should stand for. I'm surprised Sununu voted with the majority (maybe I need to start believing in God or something).

Now, next on my sinister gay agenda, I want polygamy with my two dogs, my parrot and my Sonicare(tm) toothbrush!

Now I'm off to Rick Santorum's site simply to send him a message saying "Ha ha ha!"

Political Little Me

2004-07-13T15:46:00.000-05:00

Hmm. Seems I'm not as leftist as I thought I was. I took the World's Smallest Political Quiz again and I've shifted a bit.

Cool.

Suspend the Elections?

2004-07-11T21:15:00.000-05:00

Story here.

OH NO HE DIDN'!!!!

Just try it, bitches, it'll be, as my good friend Anna puts it, torches and pitchforks time.

Dallas PD, Shame On You!

2004-07-11T17:11:00.000-05:00

Last night, I went to see the latest Harry Potter with my partner. It rocked but that's besides the point of this story. We went to the 8:15 pm showing and were driving home just after 11:00 pm. As we neared our exit on I-35 (one of the nastiest interstates going through Dallas after I-635) a car smashed in to the concrete median with sparks flying, jumped about 4 feet off the ground and landed in the opposite direction it had been travelling. Keep in mind our speed was about 65mph at the time and the car passed us as it wrecked so you just know some poor asshole in the car was probably quite a bit shaken up at the very least. We saw no other vehicle hit the car and there was no fire.

Anyway, neither of had our cell phones with us (we are polite at the movies thank you very much) so we carried on to our exit about 1/4 mile away and pulled in to the gas station at the off ramp. Luckily there was a police car sitting at the gas station so we pulled up beside it. We waved at the officer to roll down her window and she did. We told her what we had seen on I-35 and she said "oh, I'm filling out a report right now, there are other cops out there, they'll deal with it." Uh. What the fiddly fuck?! We asked her again to at least radio in the accident and she looked positively annoyed, as if we'd asked her for a private peep show in the back seat of her car. She finally did radio the accident in and that was that but the fact that we had to fight with her to get her to report an accident frustrated us incredibly.

My partner is the president of our neighborhood association so we do know quite a few members of our local government. He wrote our councilwoman and the councilman of the neighboring district. Hopefully this police officer gets what's coming to her. To protect and to serve indeed.

So, to the officer sitting in car 0305 at approximately 11:03 pm on Saturday, July 10 at the Fina gas station at Inwood and I-35, to hell with you. I hope if you ever get your ass in to a wreck, someone else is too busy filing their end of shift paperwork to help you.

So, so proud

2004-07-11T09:01:00.000-05:00

I just ordered a Kerry/Edwards yard sign. Now I can have my house vandalized by rabid neo-cons as well as my car (which sports a Kerry bumpersticker)!

Living in Texas, it gives me hope when I hear very conservative neighbors talk about how disgruntled they are with Bush. I've asked why they don't like him and usually their answers revolve around conservative ideals which the majority of the population agree with. Bush has pushed us in to an incredible amount of debt, under Bush the government has expanded to its largest size ever, under Bush there is more government intervention in our daily lives than ever before, the list goes on. Basically Bush represents the worst sides of both parties. He's a massive fiscal liberal and a massive social conservative. That, folks, is neo-conservative, not conservative.

There is the other side of the spectrum too, of course. Those that think just because he's a Republican on paper, he can do no wrong. I have to wonder what these peoples true political ideals are. After all, Bush's daddy's politics weren't the same as Junior's and they definitely weren't the same as Reagan's. I have to conclude, therefore, that those who vote a straight party ticket are either (a) uninformed or (b) idiots.

Yes, I'm arrogant. :-)

FMA

2004-07-07T19:52:00.000-05:00

The FMA is up for vote in the Senate on Monday. I doubt it will pass. At least, not with the 2/3 majority needed. Even if it did pass by some fluke and made it all the way in to the Constitution, it would soon be repealed.

Bush's endorsement of the FMA is only lip service to the couple million evangelicals that didn't vote in 2000 and, of course, bigots. It's rather sad that Bush has to garner votes via a hate-filled message rather than one that is hope-filled.

Now there will be folks who say "jus' hold yo horses thar, boy, I ain't no bigot. I jus' dun like me them faggots! It jest ain't right! Praise Jaysus!"

Uhhuh. Exactly.

This is another thing I don't understand. I've heard all sorts of reasons to not allow same-sex couples to marry. Here are a few with my responses. Please note that some of my responses are meant to be taken in jest and some are serious. It's up to you to discern which is which and if you get it wrong, well, tough titties. Turns out it's no skin off my ass.

1. If we allow same-sex marriage, we'll soon allow marriage to animals, appliances, etc.
Well, first and foremost, Mister Santorum, would you please get out of the closet already? (Hint: that was the jest part.) This is the typical right-wing slippery-slope debate method. It is, of course, utter crap. Marriage that isn't between consenting adults would be void. But what about brother/sister marriage? That idea ooks me out quite a bit. I'll defer that to Judge Holmes in Arkansas. I'm sure he'll be able to come up with a sane answer to that one (*snort*)

2. It erodes the sanctity of marriage!
Sanctity is a religious idea. The first amendment is wants its meaning back, please. Second, sanctity? Oh, come on. Britney Spears? "Marry my dad"? "Who wants to mary a millionaire"? Yeah, that's sanctity. And Rush Limbaugh just got divorced again. What is it, the third time now? Sanctity, my pretty, white posterior.

3. Same-sex marriages can't produce children!
Not by conventional methods, that's true. So what? There are tons of kids out there waiting to be adopted and there are gay couples with children from previous relationships. Gay parents do not turn kids gay. Many straight couples either choose not to have children and/or cannot have children. Should their marriages be void too?

4. Jaysus dun' like no butt-sex!
Marriage isn't just about sex. The Supreme Court has already said consenting adults can use whichever orifice they want to for sexual pleasure.

Anyway, watch the news on Monday. :-)

The J. Leon Holmes Fiasco

2004-07-07T16:04:00.000-05:00

Despite the outcries from the usual suspects (People for the American Way, Planned Parenthood, etc), J. Leon Holmes was approved by the Senate (US District Court, Eastern District of Arkansas). It doesn't surprise me but it does disgust me. After all the blocking the Dems have done so far of less fanatical, maniacal judges, they have to let this one slip through. Who is blowing who here? Thankfully, this smelly little cat turd of a person will not be in a position to legislate his beliefs about women or morality.

You know, I'm all for someone having a different opinion but I still just don't get the whole "women are inferior, abortion is evil" thing. The first Prime Minister I remember in England was Margaret Thatcher so women in positions of power has never been an issue to me. Abortion (or opposition to) was never a party platform in the UK. Citizens either agreed with the right to choose or they didn't. They didn't go around blowing up clinics that performed abortions or anything like that. People, for the most part, understand that an abortion is a medical decision between a woman and her doctor.

But back to Judge Needledick. Quote from People for the American Way:

Holmes has blamed the feminist movement for what he believes is the erosion of morality, including criticism of “artificial contraception.”

“It is not coincidental that the feminist movement brought with it artificial contraception and abortion on demand, with recognition of homosexual liaisons soon to follow. . . . No matter how often we condemn abortion, to the extent we adopt the feminist principle that the distinction between the sexes is of no consequence and should be disregarded in the organization of society and the Church, we are contributing to the culture of death.”

In the same article written with his wife, he stated that “... the wife is to subordinate herself to her husband.”

Just how in buggery bollocks does someone like that get votes from female senators and any sane male senator? And just why are any Democrats voting "yay"? The vote results are here. I was pleasantly surprised that one of our Texas senators, Kay Bailey Hutchinson, voted "nay" even though she is a right-wing zealot. Mark this as perhaps the first time ever I've agreed with her on anything.

First Post (or how to be a cheesy title writer in one easy lesson...)

2004-07-07T11:22:00.000-05:00

I've gotten the blog itch again. This is the third blog I've started in as many years. I've never quite gotten the hang of blogging. Usually I get fired up about something, feel the need to bitch in to the ether and then go quiet again. Hopefully I can manage to keep this blog going for more than a few posts.

So who am I? Well, I'm a 20-something Brit living in Dallas, Texas. I'm not a US citizen but that doesn't exempt me from having an opinion. I pay taxes, dammit, and I'm gonna bitch. To give you a quick idea of what the posts on this blog will be like, here are a few words I'd use to describe myself and a list of things that piss me off. After all, they'll form most of the content on this blog.

Things I am:
Gay, left-leaning, progressive, pro-choice, fabulous, ex-smoker, ex-pothead, fabulous, pro-separation of Church and State/Hate, anti-fascist, anti-communist, fabulous.

Things I really don't like:
Religious fundamentalists, extreme right- and left-wingers, people who don't understand moral relativity, Fred Phelps.

There, that should be a good start. I'll be back with my two shiny pennies on the appointment of J. Leon Holmes to the US District Court for the Eastern District of Arkansas sometime soon. Until then, toodles.